Round Six: Flooding Red Guard, Hidden Extra

With Anzac Day looming, defence was forefront on the minds of all in the lead-up to Round Six. And by all I mean not just those associated with the AFL's second biggest day of the year, or those in the Australian community with reason to be thankful to the Anzacs (ie. every last one of us). No, in the national capital at least, it was our friends in the Chinese community who were focused firmly on defence as the beleagured Olympic torch relay came to town. Following the protest-ridden debacles in London, Paris and San Francisco the expatriate and local Chinese population were determined that the Canberra leg should be successful and free of such dissent, and so elected to ensure the safety of the torch by sending in the latter-day equivalent of the Red Guards. Whether this action won friends and promoted the Olympic spirit is probably a topic for discussion for another blog. However, credit where credit is due- their defensive efforts were spectacular. Borrowing a leaf out of Paul Roos' coaching playbook, the red-clad defenders swarmed into their opponents' zone and effectively smothered their creativity- flooding at its best. Like all games involving flooding it made for a less than edifying spectacle, but at the end of the day the torch was defended and the opposition left town nursing their bruises and knowing they'd been in a contest.
If only Essendon had taken a leaf out of the Chinese book on Anzac Day itself! Unfortunately the Dons' single-focused attack at all costs game plan was well and truly blocked by Collingwood, who ran away with a 73 point victory- the record margin for an Anzac Day fixture. To add extra chagrin to Bombers' fans, the shellacking was witnessed by both Sapphic songstress kd lang and peevish malcontent George Costanza, both guests of the Magpies. A hugely disappointing result for Essendon, the honeymoon is now well and truly over for Matthew Knights. Let's not dwell on the disappointment further. Here instead is someone whose honeymoon was over some time ago, George W Bush, rapping on his troubles as only he can- http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7JX-Bx0BETQ.
If the Anzac Day afternoon game was a bit one-sided, the evening fixture was anything but. Geelong travelled to Fremantle as warm favourites, with redheaded stalwart Cameron Ling in line to break the record for playing in the most consecutive matches (having missed the Cats' Round 21 slipup against Port last year). However the Dockers stunned all and sundry by bursting out of the blocks to establish a 39 point lead in the second quarter, only to surrend all but 2 points of it by halftime. Even more amazingly the Dockers then shot away again, establishing a 25 point lead at three quarter time. But the Cats then demonstrated why so many think they'll go back to back in '07, piling on five unanswered goals before Dockers' skipper Pavlich got one back. The Pav then had a chance to steal the game for Freo but rattled the woodwork, resulting in a win by the closest of margins for the Cats. Controversy followed after the match with the revelation that the timekeepers had lost 11 seconds- pretty crucial in such a tight match.
The round continued the next day with Carlton's brief and altogether unfamiliar winning run coming to an end against Adelaide. Port continued to put their season back on track after a shaky start by accounting for St Kilda; while the Bulldogs thrashed the teetering Eagles to remain undefeated. The big story from this match was Daniel Kerr, the sole remaining member of the great Eagles' triumverate (Cousins, Judd and Kerr), copping a suspension for headbutting.
The hapless Demons faced mission impossible up at the Gabba against Brisbane, and so it proved- the Lions up by 52 points with Daniel Bradshaw booting six. Bradshaw has two chief rivals for the Coleman Medal this year, the Hawks' star Lance "Buddy" Franklin and the Urinator from Carlton. Both of the latter managed only a single goal in Round Six, with Franklin's radar being right off against Richmond (a not uncommon complaint). Despite the best efforts of ageing Tiger cult hero Matthew Richardson the Hawks were able to squeeze out a narrow victory and along with the Cats are ladder leaders after Round Six.
By far the most controversial result of the round came at Telstra Dome on Sunday afternoon, where the Swans were the visitors and North Melbourne the hosts. Correctly predicting that the Swans would have taken back the flooding tactics used so successfully by the Chinese some days earlier, and that the game would be an absolute snorefest, I did something else until the last five minutes of the match. Switching it on I was vindicated in this policy, with the scoreboard demonstrating that the two sides had managed a pitiful 60-odd points each in perfect conditions (ie. under a closed roof). After doing their best to bore each other into submission for three and three quarter quarters, however, all hell broke loose in the last few minutes. First the Swans thought they had the game won with a snap that may or may not have been touched across the line, the goal umpire ruled that it was a point and scores were all tied up. As they were when the siren sounded moments later, prompting wild celebrations from a couple of North players who believed they were ahead for some reason despite all evidence being to the contrary, including on the numerous scoreboards located around the ground. The second straight Sunday arvo draw, following the Bulldogs-Tigers' tie the previous week. However once more there was controversy to follow, with it emerging that the Swans had had 19 players on the ground for a period of time towards the end of the match. Rather than being stripped of their match points, as many thought they should be, Sydney escaped with a fine. It is clear that the system needs reviewing though. North were furious at the suggestion that their skipper should have called for a player count, not an easy thing to do in the final stages of a match with scores level. The last time that kind of thing happened was in a Dockers-Saints match some time back, the count was correct and the bloke who called for it looked like a right dill.
So much excitement from another thrilling round, already it's clear that the top three sides (Cats, Hawks and Bulldogs) are likely to claim three of the prized top four spots. Who is going to emerge to take the other one? Have the Demons ensured the number one draft pick already or can one of the WA teams beat them to it? What happened to those missing 11 seconds? Find out next week right here at Wrap central- where the footy reporting is belated, but better.