Less than a month ago, the Magpie Army was flying high. They had just belted Adelaide, a week after completing a difficult away win against the top four Swans. They were then, as now, the only team to have beaten the all-conquering Cats. Given that they had come within five points of achieving the mother of all upsets against the same opposition in last year’s Preliminary Final, many pundits had them down as a genuine dark horse for the 2008 premiership. They just needed to secure the last top four position which, given the Swans’ shaky form, they seemed more than capable of doing. Then it all went horribly wrong. A second disappointing defeat for the season against the unfancied Kangaroos was followed by a wholly unexpected thumping at the hands of Essendon, a team Collingwood had summarily put to the sword by 12 goals on Anzac Day. Then the Magpies were made to look like second rate pretenders by the genuine item in Hawthorn (further details later in the Wrap). And the (seemingly) final nail was put in the coffin of the Pies’ 2008 season late on Sunday night.
The facts of the case are these, Your Honour. Despite the finals being imminent, the brothers Shaw and one Alan Didak decided to enjoy a classy night at Kew’s finest tavern, the Geebung Polo Club. Somewhat more than a few beverages later, the junior Shaw elected to drive home in a slightly weaving manner, predictably taking out dodgem car style a few innocent bystanders (mercifully in the form of parked cars) on the way. The police arrived to find Shaw Jr and Didak on the scene, but were informed (as was the footy club) that Didak had not been in the car but had rather been summoned by Shaw to assist in his hour of need. This, not surprisingly, turned out to be a packet of lies. Didak had indeed been in the car, for the second year in a row he had made a bad passenger-related decision. Unfortunately for Collingwood, and El Presidente Eddie McGuire in particular, the truth didn’t emerge until after all and sundry had sworn blind before the assembled media that the passenger had not been Didak but a “scaly mate” of Shaw Jr’s. Hell hath no fury like a high profile TV show host made to look like a schmuck. When the dust settled both Didak and Shaw Jr had been handled season-ending suspensions and comparatively light fines (Shaw Sr got two weeks for drinking while injured). The suspensions of two of the Pies’ top players mean that just making the finals is going to be a big ask now, let alone getting a top four spot. And the dark horse of premiership contention has been put behind a screen and shot. It seems more than likely that Alan Didak will not be at Collingwood next season, the only reason he wasn’t sacked would seem to be that the Pies think they can get something for him on the trading market at the end of the year. By all accounts President McGuire gave the playing group a fearsome spray on Monday, not a happy team at all are the Magpies.
Hawthorn, on the other hand, are a very happy team as their jaunty club song would attest. And they were singing it long and loud on Friday night after easily accounting for the hapless Pies. As ever forward Lance “Buddy” Franklin was the man to watch, booting a lazy eight while missing another half dozen. One of these days he’s going to learn to kick straight and will break the goals in a game record by half time. As it is he’s leading the Coleman Medal tally for both goals and behinds. Eight was the magic number once more the next day at the MCG, this time it was Bombers’ skipper Matthew Lloyd enjoying a day out. Lloyd’s heroics were the bright spot of an otherwise lacklustre match, the absolute highlight was Lloyd turning back the years, launching himself into the stratosphere and most probably securing the car for Mark of the Year. Drive sober, Lloydy! Dons by 16 points, and a most unlikely finals appearance is still an outside possibility. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pIPGdAL1gLU&feature=related
Alive too are the finals prospects of North Melbourne, who fought out a gritty win against the rapidly faltering Lions in the Roos’ last ever “home game” on the Gold Coast. With the Roos’ departure, the “coast” (b’doom ching!) is now clear for the as yet un-monikered new side- Gold Coast Dugongs, anyone? The Roos are now very much in the mix for the last top four spot, although getting it is going to be something of a poisoned chalice as it involves coming up against Geelong in the first week of the finals. The Roos did just that last year and got absolutely annihilated. Brisbane, on the other hand, would probably be happy just to be involved in September after blowing yet another winnable game. As indeed would Richmond, who took the game up to the seemingly unbeatable Cats in the first half, but were comprehensively trounced in the second. Not that there’s any shame in that, Hawthorn is the only team to get anywhere near Geelong in the last couple of months. In yet another game involving potential finalists, Adelaide was able to hold off the fast finishing Carlton. Difficult now for the Blues to make it to September, they’ll need to win all of their remaining matches to have a shot one would think.
To the Sunday matches, and to the great joy of the public service there was AFL footy on at Historic Manuka Oval- the match of the round, no less! And conditions were absolutely superlative, perfect blue sky, ground in excellent nick and two teams in the top four with everything to play for. The Bulldogs and Swans both looked resplendent in their contrasting strips but it was the Swans who got off to a flyer with four unanswered goals in the first six minutes. It appeared as though a boilover was on the cards, particularly as the Dogs had lost their last two matches. However Dogs’ coach Rodney Eade (formerly at the helm of the Swans) was able to flick a switch and the Bulldogs put through eleven of the next twelve goals to go in comfortably ahead at the halftime break. The Swans then had the better of the third quarter, but the Dogs held them off and recorded a very valuable win. Hawthorn and the Western Bulldogs are now all but certain to play each other in week one of the finals, what a cracker of a game that’s going to be. The Swans are still desperately clinging to fourth, but this was a rare defeat in their ACT home away from home. They’ll be looking to regain some form before the finals kick off.
To the last two games of Round 18 and down in Melbourne the Saints marched in in a close one against the massively underachieving Port Adelaide. It’s difficult to imagine how the Power made it to a Grand Final less than 12 months ago, they’ve never even looked like being a contender in 2008. The Saints though are still definitely in contention for that last top four spot. They were given extra motivation to have a real tilt for the title in the days following the Round’s conclusion by the announcement that the AFL’s oldest player Robert Harvey will hang up his boots at the end of this season. Harvey is an indisputable champion of the game, a back to back Brownlow Medallist and eight time all-Australian. He made his debut back in the old VFL in 1988- anyone remember World Expo ’88? Or the Seoul Olympics? Certainly not the copious number of players on AFL lists who weren’t even born in 1988! An amazing career, unlikely that anyone else is going to chalk up 21 seasons at the top level of such a physical game any time soon.
And historic retirements were the order of the day over in the west as well, as Freo’s final foundation player Sean McManus chose the latest version of Derby: Fully Loaded as the occasion for his final match. McManus has been there since day one of the Dockers’ long strange purple journey, through tragedy and disappointment, the bad moments and the frustrating. There haven’t been too many moments of actual success for Fremantle over the last fourteen seasons. However the two matches a season their long-suffering fans crave victory in are the two against West Coast, and this year the Dockers have won them both! So perhaps their season hasn’t been all bad after all. Their win saw them leapfrog Port Adelaide into fourth bottom, the Eagles’ are now rooted in the bottom two and still in danger of a first wooden spoon just two seasons after taking a (possibly substance-assisted) premiership.
So just four rounds to go in the 2008 home and away season for all bar those whose propensity to have a lager or two, drive in a less than confidence-inspiring manner and then play fast and loose with the truth have seen them banished to the sidelines. Drive carefully, all! And never, ever, make Eddie McGuire look foolish. Here’s a treat, a sneak preview of the AFL Grand Final pre-game entertainment for 2008. See you back here for the Round 19 Wrap next week.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=31x2WpuSAkA
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4 comments:
Dugongs it is. Although the 'Date Palms' has a ring to it.
And perhaps Eddie can merge 'Who wants to be a Millionaire' with Collingwood training - (insert suspenceful music) Did you Mr Didak a) tell Heath to drive his car, b) arrive later on a Harley like a good samaritan in the night, c) buy shares in Jack Daniels, d) want to be traded to the Dugongs?
I had a soft spot for the Gold Coast Irukundji, but I suppose they're too far south for that.
The Hawks/Pies game was brilliant, we watched that with delight, but couldn't find any coverage at all of the Bombers! How annoying.
And Didak should just go, he's an embarrassment. Did you see the letter in the Age telling him off? Most amusing.
Brilliant wrap as always!
Kirsten
As long as Gold Coast have white shoes as part of the uniform I don't really care what their name is. Although I'm all for Breezers, which nicely sums up large parts of the coast and all of Schoolies week.
I certainly hope the choreography for the Grand Final is better than that of the Finnish duo. Well, it can't really be worse I suppose.
Didak is more entertaining off the field than on it. Not that that's a good thing.
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